conflict mediation

why i’m quitting mediation

so this is why i’m quitting mediation

Here’s a picture for you:

You’ve had enough. It’s time for a re-think. Time to put things into perspective. You’re stressed out your box with this conflict, and don’t know where to turn. You know that if things continue to go south, the ball’s gonna burst and you could end up with gold-plated lawyers involved, or worse, arguing over a paper-strewn oak table in court. You don’t want that. You’ve enough on your plate. You just want to put this nonsense behind you and get on with things, right?

And then some bright spark hits you with: hey chill out, have you tried mediation? Read more “why i’m quitting mediation”

the conflict game

the conflict game

new balls please

Those who follow my work will know that I hung up my court gown some time ago, that my ethos in conflict intervention has moved towards helping those in conflict engage with it constructively. As with current trends in this field, although my initial post-litigation training focused solely on mediation, over time I’ve begun to adopt a less defined role, and therefore, rather than holding up mediation before those in conflict as the only path they need to take, rather than assuming that it’s the magical answer to everything, actually I’ve come to find that what they really need is for us to help them towards a path that feels right for them, that can twist and turn according to what they need instead of how it’s been laid out before them. Read more “the conflict game”

conflict resolution

mediation is a waste of time

It really is. So don’t bother even thinking about trying mediation to sort your issues out after separation!

Who am I talking to when I say this?

Well, really I’m talking to those who are in the middle of conflict after their separation. Maybe it’s a conflict about the kids, where they should live, when each of you should get to see them, who needs to pay for them. Or maybe it’s about finances, whether the pension should be shared, how much money needs to be paid every month to keep the other going. Read more “mediation is a waste of time”